Hi, I think this is the correct forum.
I am hoping someone can give me some advice.
I was made supervisor a year ago & have had issues with some staff, in particular a female who refuses instruction from me, it got out of control as she harassed, bullied & intimidated me and making jokes about me in front of customers at work. I told my manager who said she would investigate it, she got back to me to tell me she will fire the bully, but a month went by and nothing happened. Bully’s behaviour got worse. A rumor got out and now this girl (the bully) has put in a complaint about me, I feel she saw a window of opportunity (on purpose given time to make a complaint about me!).
She handed in a disgusting letter which my manager just gave me to read. I am shocked, as it reads as a complaint about me saying awful lies about what I said & did, she even lied about me abusing customers (that I have talked to to support me, with proof). Most hurtful is her saying because my husband left me, that I confided in her & that I am under stress and I am brining the stress to work, & that she caught me smoking pot in lunch break.
Firstly, my husband never left me (though we did separate 2yrs ago, for just 1month, he had an affair, but that is behind us now, and we are planning a family now, everyone knows this fact, I feel she twisted it & used it against me, blowing it out of proportion. This has caused me grief & stress, brining up old emotions I got over. My husband is disgusted also. My private life is private, I can’t believe she talked about it in the letter), I am outraged at the claim I do drugs! I don’t drink or smoke! But she said she saw me one-on-one ! OMG !! I am prepared to take drug test. I am stressed that my reputation by the insinuation is already damaged. I also NEVER confided in her, I am not her friend, I am professional. I knew she was going to be ‘Trouble’, so I made sure to keep it strictly professional. She made many more (10pages) of allegations, of how I am always late for work (when in fact she is always late), how I complain about other staff (when I don’t, in fact she complains and bitches about staff everyday).
I Feel the letter is harassment in itself, and she has written many terrible things about me, which now my manager won’t even talk to me or look at me, her words have defamed my character and reputation. I was due for promotion review to manager in a few months, now I fear that I have no hope. Especially as my manager has gone cold with me.
I see that she has written vexatious lies to ‘smoke screen’ the real issue, which is her behaviour, and she is now making management confused that there is issue between us, when there is not, as it is purely about the work, it is not personal.
I feel she has made a personal attack against my character, causing management to doubt me. Especially as the bully has been in the company longer than me (by 4years). I have not ever said anything of a personal attacking nature toward her ever. I also don’t know how to respond to these outrageous lies. What can I do?
I am so stresses, I am considering stress leave, but not sure how that works.
I wonder can I take her to civil court outside of work? I have been reading about defamation (but mainly media and bloging cases), also about malice intent, by her creating lies to cause me harm. But I am not sure how this works.
Can someone please help me? Thank you in advance.
ps; I am in country NSW, Australia.
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Defamation Of Character, Workplace Harassment & Bullying5 comments to Defamation Of Character, Workplace Harassment & Bullying |
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Your the supervisor….appears you can’t handle the job…..suck it up and move on…….
You need to file a complaint with your personnel department and, if your country permits, file a suit against this person for defemation of character AND file a complaint against your boss for non-action. You have the proof, especially that letter, which is full of lies.
Does your manager work in another building, or on site? Did this same manager hire you, and give you your previous assessments? I’m confused as to why the manager should automatically take the side of an obvious nut job over yours.
You are letting this get the best of you. I don’t blame you for being stressed, but you have got to get hold of yourself. Of course the letter is harassment, and any manager worth her salt would know that someone who writes a ten page letter full of outrageous allegations, on the face of it, has a major problem.
IMO, this is the attitude you need to take with your manager. You should sit down with her and say, “(her name), how long have we worked together? You know where this is coming from. She’s angry because I complained about her. Why on Earth would I talk to her about my personal relationship or anything else? As to the drugs, that is ludicrous. I’m happy to take a drug test anytime, anywhere. I’m angry that it has to come to that, but I will do it.”
This has to be dealt with now, and you have to be proactive in getting the ball rolling into your court again. Don’t just sit there in shock, letting events overtake you. Bring your manager into it, by asking her why she didn’t fire the little rag when she said she was going to? (In fact, you should have asked that a long time ago.) You want the results of the drug test in your file, and you expect a written apology and retraction from the accuser.
Also, to totally CYA, consult an employment attorney regarding bringing a libel case against her. A half hour consultation, with a copy of the letter for the attorney, can give you a huge amount of peace of mind info, and it isn’t expensive.
Stand up to this girl! Tell her to her face that she may think she can lie and bully you out of your hard earned job, but guess what, you worked your a$$ off to get where you are, and you are not going to give that up, ESPECIALLY not because of some juvenile, lying half wit trying to run you out. This isn’t high school, she’s not a minor, and there are going to be consequences for her actions. If you just lay down and take it, you will regret it for the rest of your life. Start now to change your way of thinking, and approach this problem with the self confidence that comes from knowing you are right.
I’m sorry to hear about your situation. Unfortunately it is all too common. If I were you, I would certainly seek help from your human resources department. Talk with your supervisor so they know before hand. When you are discussing the situation, you will need to discuss the behaviors that are occurring – not the person who is bullying you. Don’t personally attack the person. List the behaviors they are engaging in that are causing you personal distress as well as lost productivity. Taking on Bullies…In Court? Should We Criminalize Workplace Incivility?
Do NOT simply “suck it up.” No one, including management, should be subjected to abusive, immoral behavior in the workplace or anywhere else. Your country has law prohibiting workplace bullying. Most likely, it has civil law against slander and libel as well. This woman is bullying up out of jealousy that you were promoted over her. We are fighting mightily in the US to create such law. Aussies already have it. Use it. Find an attorney…yesterday! Got to a doctor and begin stress treatment. Your employer may be held responsible, if nothing is done. Read the law from the internet site for your government. Take time off after reporting stress manifestations to HR. Buy a copy of “The Bully at Work,” or whatever book is tailored to your country. Visit websites such as ours in California or of The Workplace Bullying Institute. The Drs. Namie at the Institute can send you directly to the psychologists in Australia who are exposing this silent epidemic of inhumanity toward man. Watch the BNET video “Calling a Bully a Bully.” I will see you there. Get busy when you take that stress leave for respite. This woman has done it before you and she will do it after unless someone shows her the crimes she is committing toward her fellow man. You are not alone. Others care. Go for it and go with the grace of the law.