Boyfriend’s Too Stressed For Sex. What Can I Do To Help?
My boyfriend of five months has a reduction in his libido. He’s never been a horribly sexual person ( we would have sex three time a week says he’s been like that for a year. I could go everyday) but the past few weeks its averaged to once a week. He claims its stress which I believe considering he owes his room mate $1000 (which is hard because of the job he has) has to find a apartment soon because the lease is up, is trying to decide what he wants to major in, supports himself, holds down two classes right now, and has health problems from previous injuries which he can’t really do anything about because he doesn’t have health insurance. So yes I firmly believe that stress is the cause our lack of sex. I want to know how to help. I love having sex with him but have never tried to make him feel bad about not wanting sex. However, he can tell that some times it frustrates me and feels bad that. I just want to know if there’s anyway to help him relax and get through all of this lately it seems like all I can do is just be there for him and hope for the best. I’m sure if there is than our sex life will pick up. I wish he could go to an actual doctor but as i said before he can’t afford it. Any de-stressing tec. or anything would be most appreciated.
I know this is not good for you, but honestly, your boyfriend has very legitimate reasons to feel stressed, it is normal to feel stressed when undergoing such stressful times in life, and normal for libido to go down. It seems you are more focused on having sex whereas his focus is on other things right now. Anything you could do to ameliorate the specific situations that stress him out would be a nice thing for you to do as a supportive girlfriend, but do it for his sake, not just so you can have more sex – unless your focus shifts more to himself than to yourself, nothing you do is going to reduce his stress.
In other words….stop pressuring him about reducing his stress and having more sex, he coping the best he can right now, and he doesn’t need the added pressure from you…